My fathers eightieth birthday!

March 22, 2009

Today was again a busy day. We were visited by my sister and brother-in-law and reached an agreement over the present for our father who has his eightieth birthday on Thurday the 26th of March. A milestone that must be celebrated! But my dad doesn’t want to celebrate his birthday because, so I believe, he’s not in the mood. And who can blame him for that? A dying son and nothing or nobody can change that. My parents are trying to not show any emotion. And they have become great actors, I almost can’t see that from time to time they are crying. Me too, I also have to cry from time to time.


But I also have to laugh a lot. E.g. about a silly programme on the TV or if our cats look like they are innocent (not!). And I can be very happy because Monling takes good care of me and we love eachother so much. And I can e.g. enjoy receiving so many cards, especially from Caroline Mesman and my sister. They use every opportunity to write. And I’m happy that my family and closest friends pay me a visit that often that I must “hit the brakes” sometimes (for sure while I’m undergoing chemo therapy). Last but least this Blog gives me so much fun and through it I made so many new friends (. 

In short: I’m enjoying myself, it is almost ;-) the best time of my life! But how to tell that to my family. Well, I’m hoping that they read this post again sometime when I’m no longer there. And then I hope that they remember, just like when we were told the prognosis last year, me stating that I had a great life. I hope that they believe me. Because it’s the truth.



  1. Mijn liefste broer,

    de gedachte, dat ik je kwijtraak, doet me pijn en maakt mijn hart zwaar. De onzekerheid, hoe lang ik nog kan genieten van je aanwezigheid, geeft me een machteloos gevoel. Als jankerd van de familie (zijn je eigen woorden) ben ik regelmatig in tranen. Maar zolang jij niet opgeeft, zal ik er voor je zijn. Je ben een knapperd, dat je alles zo kan beredeneren. En dus hoop ik op een gunstige uitslag van de MRI, een draaglijke chemokuur en dat jullie samen op reis kunnen gaan. Kus

  2. Man! What a post…

    Maybe I am not known as the cry-baby of the family but reading this turns my stomach. I think it’s human behavior to treat things as long as it is not said or written it doesn’t exist. Of course we all know that you are in a very bad condition but still hope on a miracle. I have cried many times in the beginning but get used to the idea now… Also thanks to the fact that we witness your brave handling of your sickness. I just wish you continous strength and acceptable sorrow for the time you have. This blog is great to get your feelings, opinions and thoughts about things so we have (sorry to be selfish) a reminder of you. So keep on blogging!

    Hope to see you soon!

    Your friend

    @Dad of Payt,

    Happy birthday even though the circumstances are bad. Hope you had at least a sort-of good day; the cake looks delicious! We haven’t met that often but I always really admired your dedication to your son. My sincere regards,


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